Monday, March 17, 2014

Effective Discipline Techniques for the Stressed Parent

It is only natural to feel as though you have more to deal with than you can handle.  This is often the case when no matter what tactics you use your child just won’t seem to listen.

No matter what discipline style you use; try to remember the following tips:

•    It is better not to try to discipline your child while you are overly-stressed out, irritable, or feeling angry. You are more likely to say or do the wrong thing if you do not take time to cool down and assess the situation before acting.

This may be hard to do when a situation warrants your immediate attention, but it can help you from making mistakes you will regret. At the very least, taking a few deep breaths and/or counting to ten will help you calm down enough to think rationally.

•    Make sure you withhold consequences from a misbehaving child, but not your love. For instance, you may restrict your child from using the phone, watching television, or playing video games.

However, it is not wise to send the child to bed without supper, refuse to hug the child, or tell the child you do not love him or her. Doing so will send the child that your love is conditional, which can damage the child.

•    If you make a mistake in trying to correct your child own up to it as soon as possible. For instance, perhaps you had made the mistake of accusing a child of a wrong the child did not commit.
                 
This is an honest mistake, as you may or may not have been misinformed regarding a particular situation. Nevertheless, it would be great of you to tell your child you are sorry you doubted him/her.  It doing so, you will teach your child about another aspect of love-forgiveness.

Aside from the tips mentioned above, you may have other things to consider.  For instance, perhaps you find yourself becoming more short-tempered than usually lately. If so, it could be for any number of reasons.

One of the most common reasons a parent is overly irritable or even angry at times is he or she is overworked. If this is the case, you may need to find ways to cut back on your responsibilities.  Also, you may just need more of a break from your child once in awhile.

It is perfectly “normal” to need time away from your child. Perhaps you need to remember what it is to have fun with other adults, and it may be time to hire a qualified sitter and plan an evening out.

Reducing the stress in your life will help you become more effective in disciplining your child.  If this helps the situation, then you will be able to strengthen the relationship between you and your children. Furthermore, you will be more likely to gain their respect.

In the event you are at wits end and have tried everything to get your child to behave and have not succeeded, further intervention may be necessary. For example, many parents have brought their child to see a therapist and have found out that the child was born with some time of disability or mental impairment.

One of the most common behavioral disorders is Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD).  This is one that can be corrected with alternative discipline measures and/or medication.

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